I woke with thoughts of the past this morning. A sense of time in my life where I was just grinding, day in and day out, and those memories wafted through my head like ghosts, bringing a smile. This was circa 2008-ish and I learned what hard work, literally: hard, sweaty, work was during my six or so year stint in logistics at Target. I semi-retired from the place after sixteen years, but the fondest memories I have were when I was a "team member" , unloading trucks, crushing fucking cardboard and forming great friendships that became endless, and the never ending echo of "BACKSTOCK!" (the definition that is still up and running).
Every job in life holds a certain nostalgia, and my life at Target is no exception. I worked with an amazing supervisor, Vic, who became a peer later, and his wife, Lisa, two great people who I will never forget and who helped me unleash the leader inside me when I was full of self-doubt. You would never know today that I have boxed(pun intended) and sparred with self-doubt my entire life, but I have. Sometimes when my mind slips down that slippery sloop, I tell it to shut the fuck up, it's not a habit anyone should get into.
During these years, I met an Indian Metal singer, Anandraj, from a band named Avial, who did an excellent Elmo impersonation. I wrote a blog over on my blogspot site (this link is my oldest post, and it hurts my heart to read). I was inspired by the early hours and the creative juices that said hours had on me. During that time, I was published, so something in those wee hours of the morning kicked me into high gear.
I'm a sentimental person at heart, with family, traditions I used to do when the children were all small, the houses we lived in, renovated, and left our energy at to hit the road. Memories of working the jobs that formed who I am today, can be found in my fiction. The life I had as a father, husband and person in many people's arenas are the glue that hold me together and continue to grant me the light to write. When I wake with these memories, it's all because of each person I've ever met, I remember who you are. Everyone I've spoken to or formed a relationship with, I still love you all like an extended family member. You have all given me the muse to continue to write, and that kick in my ass at two in the morning, believe it or not, is instrumental to stir those sometimes dormant areas of my head. Artwork in the pic below is courtesy of my cover artist today, Gordon Whitney. He's a pro! The editing you see in my books are courtesy of Brent D. Seth, author of Short Fuse and Loose Cannon : Short Fuse II. Both of these people I met during those years, among many more.
I hope all of you are well and that the holiday season greets you with love and your traditions. I wanted to tell everyone and the world, that no matter where you are in life, no matter the misery that may visit, or stress which may take your hair by the roots, shove it all away, and continue to be you. You're strong, and loved by more than you know and if I can overcome self-doubt and melancholia, so can you. I know I'm not that big of a part in your lives today, but will always draw inspiration by our meeting and the relationships we had in the past! Thank you all and take care of yourselves!
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As always, thanks for stopping by!
Tim Eagle
Tim Eagle is an author of the novellas Stolen Seed, Life Ship, and the Vasectomus Collection. He lives full time, on the road, with his wife, Maria and their dog, Cocoa. He grew up in Michigan and is inspired by the dysfunction of America. His books are available on Amazon, godless and this site timeaglefiction.com
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